trucknuts for F*cknuts

As the area diversifies with newcomers, the original information superhighway expands. The streets, are the Original info Highway. (OH), as it will never be referred to again. 'The streets' are what 'the Man' should be using to find a citizen playing 'the fool'. Obnoxious headlights, undercarriage lighting, infringing stereo volume, Religious murals hindering view, corporate logos w/ no compensation. The target market demo for Johnny Law , turning themselves in, basically by heading out of the driveway.- no political stickers, no civic affiliation tags, or stickers proclaiming achievements their offspring may have garnered in elementary school.(spelled elite by the GOP) Said 'man', should look around the streets with open eyes and handcuffs. When you see guys with dogs tied up, but don't cruise with I love dogfighting stickers, Its because the stickers aren't sold anywhere.
Orange county is in the middle of the 'Donk car' triangle. These are cars raised to an abnormal
level allowing the riders more visibility and street status. The sacrifice: comfort, financial compensation for commercial decals, and in some opinions dignity. Local popularity of sittin' big grew from independent garages in Burlington, Roxboro, and Durham, NC. Due to the size of the 22- 26 inch rim diameter on the wheels , the ride is said to feel like driving a U.S. military equipment in Falluja or riding a smooth ostrich, with bad ankles side saddle with boxerbriefs on, but no saddle. If you know where the ankles are, we're on the same page.
Whether rural or urbane, living at home as an adult , or in the actual elevated car- They look ridonkulously funny.

"It's my damn truck!" a guy yelled at me as I laughed at how elevated his step bar was.

More than proving you have focused so much energy into something fleetingly clownish, is the theory of Necktivity. This principle beliefs - 1. 4x4 2. carpet roof to floor 3. stickers that have John Rocker political aspirations or Calvin praying/urinating on a non neck approved item or lifestyle. 4. A flag explaining how one can be a traitor, based on heritage. 5. chrome ornaments ie: flames on grill, Ed Hardy calligraphic font, and family stick figures showing potential incest victims - pets included.
what could be left? Any space is game, but what makes a statement that everyone can see -The tow package. Especially when it isn't in use and the prideful owner places a giant silver scrotum and replaces the lynch pin. To see a country boy survivin' - when he puts it on and steps back to admire it, (before he beats his Beagles into the payload for their own good!) "It's my damn truck!" a guy yelled at me as I laughed at how elevated his step bar was. His smiling lips , just beaming off those balls. Now folks know.
Once, while grinning at such a testicular set w/ an Equality sticker, and 'my Husband is a woman', or 'I wear the pants, but something- something' on it.Immediately, a woman jumped out and it looked like ass whoopin' time if I didn't straighten' right up. The truck almost morphed into a State trooper car with one sticker, personalized with my name& mapquest to the pokie. Her face dared me not to put my clown piece back in my pocket instead of pretending I'm on the phone and taking pictures. I did what her face instructed, and not on my own time. Then. phone off, and shut down. She should be a steward on a plane. I would imagine her collecting all the phones in a trashbag and tossing them up in the little secret area full of presumed goodies. Not one passenger would question getting their piece back, nor would one get a chance for in-flight clowning, text saving or otherwise. I began nervously rotating counterclockwise and tucking my shirt to deflect her glare, which may explain a burning beam through my tarheel tobagon. I looked at the waffle house, wendy's, hardee's, pizza hut,Occonneechee steak house, and all the other providers of tax base revenue that would be sprinkled in nooks and crannies without reason like so many pieces of fast food litter on Occoneechee mountain, the real Carolina's tallest point between shore and mountains, and a beautiful state park. No matter lawbreakers could pick it up. Tucking in my layers for the last time and realizing I'm out in the middle of a service station adjusting for two to three minutes, I wish I could hide under one of those Charlie Speight mystyle® wigs, popularized by Sex in the city. Is it safe too look. probably not yet, but I haven't been struck either. Ive been gutted by smaller tougher ones in the West village from lower hudson st. anglers and writers to Chelsea movies. I could take an elbow on the sidewalk outside my stoop getting a greek paper cup of black coffee outside the artbar, but thats why i'm in the boonies.
I'd prefer not to look up from my gas tank and catch a pair, but its quiet. I turned as the pair diflected the sun hit ball beams off unsuspecting people just rying to pay for gas or clean their windshield. I put on my sunglasses.
She wasn't looking, but rather talking truck with the Shell man. He's great. That man may have saved me.
I pulled up to the free air machine. "Its seventy-five cent up the street", some bulky jacket guy on a liquor cycle yells with his helmet on. I nod, "I know", I mumbled, as he kicked something, and backed out to get on, "but all the characters are here next to the highway sports fan".